Your Daily Tanorexic: Jessucka Simpleton

The Simpson sisters have one brain cell and a hell of a lot of Mystic Tan between them.



This particular photo of Jess has a more yellow color than normal. What would we call it? Honeydew melon? Rotten pineapple? I can't decide.

Jess gets an eight out of ten on the Hogan Hue scale.



"It matches my headband better than my orange skin, brother!"

Your Daily Tanorexic

Jessica Simpson has been getting a lot of attention for her weight lately, (I think she looks good,) but she deserves more attention for her tangerine tan. In the future, I will post more pics of Jessica's ever-changing skin color.



Jessica gets a seven out of ten on the Hogan Hue scale.



"Your gaping piehole distracts from the beauty of your tan, brother!"